#havent started studying at all
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coolsvilleprincess · 8 months ago
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Cleaned up some sketches cause I need to post and also I miss them terribly 13 ghosts come home pleaseeeeee!!!
There were Shaphne ones too but they took up their own page so I'll clean them up later.
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sbeana · 2 years ago
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like. its also on her back right. am i wrong about this
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spaciebabie · 2 years ago
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me drawing: fuck everything i make SUCKS why does none of it look right i should quit i should never pick up a pen again why cant i get this right im hopeless why do i bother
*starts drawing with a reference*
omg wowie it looks so gud....iyam Artiste™ forget what i say b4....iyam so Skilled and Adept i will draw forever and ever and never give up................
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mirrortouchedsea · 2 months ago
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dark. that was all he had ever known. cold, dark, damp. the boy shivers in the small room, painfully alone, only a book and his magic to keep him company. he tries not to use his magic very often, though. it seemed that the people above knew when he used it and they always always always refused to give him food until he “woke up” next, if they bothered to keep track of that. maybe this time he’ll learn their lesson. the boy whispers his spell, cur memini, and creates a small light in his fingers. this is the only spell he can cast safely, too small to be noticeable by the people above. he holds his hand over the fading book on the floor. the boy can’t read the letters on the page, but this book has pictures. he flips through it again, careful of the pages that were falling apart, admiring the figure in armor who always comes to rescue the figure in the tower, cut off from the world, just like him. the boy frequently dreams of a figure in armor coming to save him, despite the years he has spent alone. dark and cold and damp. 
the room the boy lives in, the only room he has memories of, is empty besides himself and the book. sometimes the people above would give him water and stale bread to eat, and then there was a cup and a dirty plate, but otherwise it was just the boy and the book. the boy knows why the people above have locked him away, they told him that he was a freak of nature, unnatural, dangerous. but the boy could only make lights in his palm, and that wasn’t very dangerous at all. he thinks to himself that the people above are the dangerous ones, locking away a child for something like this, but he can’t say that out loud. he doesn’t want to die again. 
the boy’s stomach grumbles and he curls in on himself, the light in his palm fades out. he longs to see the sun again, to play with the other children he can hear through the ceiling, to be normal. the people above must have decided to punish him again, though, as he doesn’t remember the last time he had anything to drink, to eat. his stomach would eat through his skin and he would still wake up the next day. why can’t he just die once and for all and be rid of the pain? why is the world keeping him here? why was he even born?
the boy closes his eyes, and falls asleep. maybe this time it won’t hurt so much. 
--- 
how long has he been here? the boy doesn’t keep track of time. he knows he’s died at least a dozen times, but how long does it take for a dozen lifetimes to pass? 
--- 
a clattering on the floor wakes the boy up. the people above decided he can eat today. stale bread and water again, but better than nothing to the boy. he crawls closer to it, listening to the door. it closes and the voices disappear. where was the sound of the lock? did they forget? 
the boy scarfs down his food and water before tiptoeing up the stairs. he doesn’t hear any voices, but he needs to be careful. he doesn’t remember what the above looks like, but he needs to leave. he needs to be free. 
slowly, quietly, he opens the door. it’s dark on the other side of it, but still much, much brighter than his room ever was. he closes his eyes but keeps the door open. breathe in, and out. opens his eyes again, blinking the brightness away. pushes the door further open. steps on the hard ground outside the door. he’s so close. closes the door quietly. turns around and holds his breath. where was outside? pick a direction and go. his legs hurt. turn the corner, listen for voices. voices are dangerous, get away from the voices. whisper his spell, create a small light. keep moving keep moving keep moving. window ahead. break it? open it? is he strong enough? lift the window up. too weak. voices coming. hurry hurry hurry must get out now. whisper spell again, hand on window. break the glass and jump through it. cuts on feet cuts on legs deal with that later. voices getting louder voices shouting. run run RUN. 
the boy runs away from the building, away from his room. freedom is so close. first get to the trees, then… he hasn’t thought that far, but he will find a way. gunshots from the house. he runs faster, must get to the trees, must hide, must be free. cur memini, he whispers again, crossing into the forest. his spell can make lights and now break windows, but he needs it to protect him at this moment. run run run until the voices are quiet again. his legs are giving out, but he needs to run. he can’t die now or they’ll find him. keep running. bare feet on sticks and stones and sharp things, everything hurts but he can’t stop. he keeps running until the sun comes up. his heart beats out of his chest. 
--- 
when he wakes up he doesn’t know how much time has passed. his heart beats fast and he sits up. did they find him? he looks around. trees, rocks, a gurgling stream. he’s free. he’s free. he sighs and lays back down. how far did he run? he needs to go further. away from other people, away from anyone who might lock him up again. he sits up again and forces himself to stand and walk towards the sound of the stream. he can start there. water is important, and he might be able to get food from the little stream too. 
his first drink of the stream water is icy cold, quenching his lifelong thirst in just a few swallows. he washes his face with it, removing years of sweat and grime. he wants to sit by the stream forever if only he could, but the people will find him eventually if he doesn’t keep moving. but he allows himself a few minutes to bathe in the water, savoring the feeling of water on his skin. his stomach still growls, wanting something more filling than the freezing water of the stream, but that would have to wait. he needs to get his bearings. 
the light of the outside world is almost blinding, he realizes. the sun and the snow made it almost impossible to see anything. he should get up above the trees. can he even do that? cur memini, he says, trying to get his voice to be louder than a whisper. his feet float a few inches above the ground. he closes his eyes and says his spell again with more conviction. Cur Memini. he feels himself shooting into the air before he opens his eyes. he can see the forest stretch out for miles around him. trees covered in snow in every direction. if the old house is behind him, he should fly straight ahead, towards the forests on the mountains. tentatively, he leans forward and focuses his magic on keeping himself afloat. 
it doesn’t take much to exhaust what little magic he has, but he’s put more distance between himself and the old house and the people above now. he should be safe to rest, truly rest. but first he should find something to eat. is there anything to eat out here? something in his head tells him to look a little closer to the ground. to his left. there’s a bush full of berries. he’s never had anything but stale bread, and doesn’t know what to expect as he crushes one with his teeth. 
the sensation overtakes him for a brief moment. the berry is sweet, yet tart, and delicious. it’s the best thing he’s ever eaten and he thanks the little voice in his head for the information as he picks several more berries from the bush. the juice runs down his chin and makes him sticky, but it feels good. he feels truly alive for the first time. 
once he’s finished picking the bush clean of its fruits, he needs to find a place to rest, to stay warm. he’s shivering in the intense cold of the north, but it’s nothing he isn’t used to. the room was never very warm after all. he listens to the little voices calling out to him, guiding him towards a small cave, instructing him on how to make a small fire to warm himself up. a small rabbit brushes against his leg and he swears one of the voices is coming from it. and with the fire going, he thanks the rabbit before it hops away back into the snow. he would be roasting that same rabbit over the fire a few months later. 
the boy can’t stay in the cave forever though. as days turn to weeks turn to months, he worries that the people above are getting closer to him. they’ll put him back in that cold, dark, damp room again. he needs to keep moving. he has been practicing his magic, casting stronger spells, and he needs to be ready to fly. it's been long enough. cur memini he says holding his hand out. a rough stick with twigs tied to the end flies into his hand. it’s a poor excuse for what he understands is a broom, but it will work. he climbs onto it and focuses. cur memini cur memini cur memini. he lifts off the ground and watches as the branches of the trees get shorter and eventually he passes above the treetops. 
he takes a moment to gather his bearings. he no longer remembers the direction the house was in, but going up is his best bet of staying away from the people above. he laughs, realizing that he is the one above them now. after a moment, he flies into the mountains. the small voices change into bigger, unfamiliar ones as he gets further into the mountain range. they tell him to hide, to stay away. he doesn’t listen. they cannot be more dangerous than the humans he is running from. 
the boy lands, still exhausted from using so much magic, but he was able to travel further this time. that has to count for something, surely. he gathers some sticks and looks for another cave to make his home in. the caves remind him too much of the room he left, so he chooses to stay close to the entrance, close to the light that reminds him he is free. the fire keeps the animals away, but the voices are curious about the new presence in their woods. they make him curious too. he should stay in the cave tonight though and regain his energy. maybe he can get some small game to fill his stomach before settling in for the night. he listens for a rabbit’s voice, or maybe a squirrel, anything that would be small enough to kill with his hands. 
at last, a small fox’s voice is heard nearby. he wonders if fox will taste different from the other game he’s eaten thus far. he lifts a hand-sized rock and slinks out of the cave towards the voice. it takes a few minutes to find the source, but the fox is curled under a tree, shivering, hungry, just like him. the boy hesitates before bludgeoning it and slinging the corpse over his shoulders. there are more foxes. he is much more important. 
the fox is only the first animal he hunts in those mountainous woods. he spends several years in that forest and eventually humans settle up there as well. the boy, or rather, the man now, has made a name for himself amongst the human populations of the north. he is no longer afraid of humans capturing him and locking him up. they are still terrified of him, but now he is in control of that terror. the hunters that left his territory alive whispered tales of the great wizard owen who inhabited the mountains and terrorized anyone who had the bad luck of running into him. 
all of this is perfectly fine with owen. eventually his reputation will grow beyond himself, encapsulating atrocities that were impossible for even someone as strong as oz to commit, but that would be a problem for future owen. for now, he is still young and living in his cave on the outskirts of a small village and scaring hunters who stray too far from their boundaries. the wolves don’t like these visitors either and gladly listen to owen’s lamentations. it keeps his hands clean of the bloodshed if he isn’t casting the spell himself. the wolves don’t care for owen either, but they respect him. and that is enough for owen. 
the first of the unwanted visitors was a young man, someone who wanted to provide for his family. he pleaded with owen and the wolves to let him go and he wouldn’t cause any problems. those pleas fell on deaf ears though as owen looked the man in the eyes. won’t your family be disappointed, he asked almost innocently, you don’t have anything to show for your efforts. the man stammered a response, they’d rather i come back alive with nothing than die trying to find food. is that so, owen reached out for the man’s chin, the distance between their faces was almost nothing. y-yes, sir, please just let me go and i won’t bother you anymore. owen grinned. oh i’m sure you won’t be causing us any trouble again. the wolves stalked out of the woods, drooling at the prospect of tearing a piece of that man for themselves. owen snapped his fingers, and they came running forward, only to stop mere inches from the now trembling man. there was a suspicious yellow stain in the snow beneath him. p-p-please sir, anything you ask, it’s yours! then make sure you tell the rest of your little village that this forest belongs to the great wizard owen. the man ran off, leaving behind a hunting rifle and a ratty sack. the rifle would be of use, but the sack became tinder for his fires. 
despite the warning from that first man, hunters continued to enter into owen’s territory. and one after the other, they ran off screaming with their tails between their legs. this should have annoyed owen, that people would ignore all of the warnings and stories that had started popping up about him, but it doesn’t. their fear feeds into his magic power, only making him stronger, and that is all fine with owen. he is no longer a weak child locked in the damp, dark basement, and he never will be again. 
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cheriexlady · 1 year ago
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Why hate on characters or have ship battles when we can just ship all four of them? Behold my case study of vanitas ship chart that will satisfy all viewers:
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Noe and vanitas are in love, vanitas and Jeanne as in love, Jeanne and Dominique are in love, and Dominique and Noe are in love.
Dominique and vanitas are like don't really care about each other at all and kinda have a mutual dislike.
And Noe and Jeanne are kinda buddies (not that close tho just like maybe respect) with a bit of jealousy on noes behalf cause remember Noe was like "I'm vexxed cause jeanne got to drink vanities's blood first"
An easy way to remember this is just, the black haired people are in love with the white haired people and the white haired people are in love with the black haired people
And now all parties are satisfied and there is no need to hate on characters or ships in the name of shipping!
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invisiblyvisiblejay · 20 days ago
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watched like three showing dan tiktok videos instead of studying for my finals today and tbh it kind of helped bc like. no matter what happens with my exams dan and phil literally will not care at all and i can still watch their videos either way. like isnt that kind of comforting
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boycritter · 2 months ago
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if i dont get into [college redacted] im straight up dropping physics. that school is the only reason im taking this secret layer of hell disguised as a class. i am not gonna put myself through another semester of this bullshit if i dont have to.
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scattered-winter · 4 months ago
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its wild just realizing how much people have done and experienced and how prepared they are for what's to come when i am . very much not . lmao
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wolfgirlboyjester · 10 months ago
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happy xalday! i had so much fun working on this one tee hee
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hiddenbeks · 19 days ago
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obsessed with liah and alek's dynamic btw......
#oc: liah#thinking abt them on this fine monday evening. also im back home from hospital again yay#anyway revan & alek/malak's relationship... it's something i need to study under a microscope#to me liah and alek r like theeee toxic worsties... always trying to one up each other... but also idk like#they make a perfect team they know each other so well. they hate each other they dont trust each other at all#no one understands them the way they understand each other!!!!#like they used to be actually genuinely good & supportive friends right?????? but there was always a teeny bit of rivalry#they were both so ambitious. and proud. and then the uhhh mandalorian wars began and so did their descent to the dark side...#and at first it's like... they're still besties... but gradually their relationship becomes a power struggle...#like the tension that always was there but only surfaced as playful banter or during sparring becomes full-blown hatred. and its nastyyy#and like on the surface they keep things professional and cooperative. however all the warmth of their friendship is gone#and beneath the surface they're like playing 5D chess#malak plotting his betrayal... liah trying to stay one step ahead and ensure that malak stays as number two...#and like??? maybe alek always knew he was second to liah... but back then he was ok with it...#but then the dark side took this feeling of inferiority and turned it into spiteful jealousy...#and maybe liah always knew she was the stronger jedi... and the dark side fed her pride and she grew obsessed with keeping it this way...#i still havent finished kotor btw. so this is all based on the vibes i've gathered so far... with my own embellishments.. etc#also the other day i learned that alek/malak is canonically 2 meters tall#and i lowkey wanna make liah shorter. to make the difference bigger#short queen and her tall sidekick (reluctant)... a fun juxtaposition...#but also i like 178 cm liah. hm#maybe if i make her like 173. still tallish but also noticeably shorter than the 2 meter guy standing menacingly behind her#anyway i need to listen to absolution again. u dont understand. it's The revan/malak/kotor album!!!!#i associate it with revan and kotor so strongly i can't think abt them without one of the songs starting to play in my head!!!!
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faaun · 4 months ago
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ok let's catch up quickly
#so i went on a few dates w this guy. long hair beautiful face kinda looked like a girl (good) said yes ma'am when i told him to do smth#(also good) film student great at photography including candids. made a sheath of leather for a sword pin i have . et cetera.#he asked to cuddle and i was like iggg and then i felt Nothing and i was like ohhh yh ok ok yep lesbian#like he meets almost all my criteria but. yeahhh no . also at the end of that date he had some weird takes. anyway broke up w him and told#him actually im p sure im a lesbian (again) and he was like yk thats the second time this has happened to me this week but its ok bc ive#fallen for this girl from berlin. and then we cooked together. anyway . met a beautiful butch lowk in love w her. weve been on (1) date.#have two exams in a few days havent studied enough going to like end it all basically. my research partner kicked me off our research#(expected(it was always skinda sketchy)) which was devastating + it happened in a lidl 15 hours into a journey from bordeaux#to go back to the UK. my friends were kinda busy paying for baguettes but also they heard this whole exchange and are kinda mad at him#my friend of 10+ years is coming over in a few days. my evil ex situationship person that i decided to stay friends w because i kept#insisting they are a good friend and not evil and also extremely beautiful? turns out shockingly enough they were evil. tried to fix them#and then i realised due to their entire friendship group being ppl like me (Every Single One of their friends are ppl they met on dating#apps then led on then dumped and proposed staying friends w) and are collectively extremely attracted to them and not over them they#keep validating the most diabolical shit they say/do to hace a chance w them. they broke up w their ex and the way they keep leading#this poor girl on and making her heartbeeak worse and saying that they want more power over her and want her to beg for them back etc...MY#JAW HAD DROPPED esp bc i didnt even know the ex was in the picture BECAUSE ME AND ONE OF OUR FRIENDS (that they also dated) HAD JUSR SLEPT#NAKED TOGETHER IN THEIR BED W THEM. GIRL. anyway that is the least of the diabolical stuff they said but no we are moving onnn#this was b4 the beautiful butch btw. anyways . i have a mitski concert tmrw i think?? idek anymore#i used to have a crush on this guy very briefly and then it disappeared and then i realised if he fundementally changed everything abt#himself then maybe id like him but ofc i didnt tell him that but i still think abt it sometimes but anyway thats irrelevant now bc 99% sure#even if he did id still not find him attractive (lesbianism). please recommend good overnight moisturisers btw i have super dry skin#right. the friend of 10 yrs. we had a hard convo abt why she essentially bullied me in year 8 and it made me highly bitter but i also love#her and ik things are diff now its been like . Many Years . and shes going to stay a while I HAVE TWO EXAMS I DONT HAVE TIME but i love her#its fine. i think i might just switch into medicine and do the whole become a neurosurgeon thing (which was my plan B) bc plan A is looking#kinda impossible rn. I WANNA TALK MORE ABT WHAT THE EX SITUATIONSHIP PERSON SAID but i wont bc i dont wanna be too mean but also . MY GOD#i had a conversation w a philosopher friend about whether i have a moral responsibility to try to fix them bc unleashing this on society#feels wrong and he said 'probably but...run' so yeah im not talking to them atm. second date w beautiful butch on monday btw IDK WHAT TO#WEAR. she said she likes fems. im just gonna wear the shortest ralph lauren skirt i have w the cute leg warmers and hope 4 the best#its 1:15 AM im abt to drink coffee and start studying bc what the FUCK man. also almost finished watching the boys its very good#one of my best friends is struggling rn it is breaking my heart i want to take the burden from her i miss her very much
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dennisboobs · 1 year ago
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do you guys ever sit and remember that dennis takes a mental health day is an episode that exists
#ada speaks#i think i could probably recite the entire one sided phone conversation he has with daisy by heart and i havent seen the ep in months#i don't know how to explain it but#from what little ive read of ross' writing it feels like. when you click onto a fanfic and you feel immediate deep trust of the author#like it just clicks#the cookbook characterization specifically. is like.#i would put my life in your hands#and im sure we will get more eps by him and i really hope that continues because i think its been a very long time since the shows had#writers that i feel Get the characters in a way that feels effortless rather than. overcompensating.#like you can smell that writer's signature no matter how hard they try to cover it up with jokes and subversions#which isnt always a bad thing and im sure if we do get more maloney eps i'll pick up on his writers quirks too#but it doesn't feel like he's trying to copy anyone/pull from old eps it feels like he has a good grasp on things which makes it feel fresh#i find that long running shows hit a point where episodes start to feel less cohesive and more like. segmented short films#but if you have a really good group of writers and they find their groove its like. yeah. ok.#i think season 3 is a good study because marder and rosell's influence is all over the entire season#later seasons you can literally just. Feel which eps they worked on because its got a completely different vibe from the rest of the season#16 still suffers from that segmentation but#i think all the first time sunny writers (and nina's first solo ep) were all absolutely fuckin bangers and they've got a good team in there#anyway. characterization of dennis flipflops a lot. but the rest of the gang arguably gets it worse at times#i think megan's dee is the absolute worst aside from conor galvin's#and i understand wanting to write her as a girlfailure who is just. horrible. but.#ok. comparing self help book dee to ross' cookbook dee. i dont even have to say anything do i.#she's like. The Woman. in the self help book. and i fucking could not stand it. ross' dee is so perfect though#and his frank. MAN.#EVERYONE FUCKING RUINS FRANK.#i think marder and rosell's frank is a lot of fun because hes clearly based on marder's dad and acts believably#a lot of writers struggle to capture his. frank-ness.#he's sort of suffered from like. bland pervy senile old man writing for a long time#and ross brought back him actually being a competent businessman#IM OUT OF TAGS IM SHUTTING UP
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sleepless-crows · 7 months ago
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im going to throw up over how much i have to study
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orcelito · 2 months ago
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I do find it so funny that I will graduate college days away from my birthday. Like my birthday is literally in between the end of the semester ("graduation") and commencement
It really will be like a joint graduation & birthday party for me lmao
#speculation nation#i dont really do birthday parties anymore. havent in a long time. mostly just go out and do smth fun around my bday. ya kno#also have cake but like not in a party way. just like. here's cake lol#but im probably only gonna graduate from college once. which means i might as well live it up and all.#invite all sorts of extended family and people who have known me. etc etc.#actually it just kinda sunk in that i am. Computer and Information Technology (Systems Analysis and Design focus) w a minor in Communication#like those are words. it's a lot of words but actually it really is pretty accurate?? like that's indeed what ive been studying.#now how much i *remember* is another question. considering how long ive taken to get thru school lol#but that's what people will see on my degree. that's my Thing. graduated in Computer Systems and Talking.#idk it's just weird to have spent so much of my life on this and like That's the culmination. it took so much work.#even beyond a normal 4 years. i switched my major *twice*. switched my minor too.#first year engineering to undecided liberal arts (as a temp major trying to switch to computer science bc i couldnt stay in FYE)#but then computer science sucked so i switched to trying to get into computer & info tech. which is different. and better.#and ive been in it long enough now that ive kinda forgotten but it did take some fuckin work to switch into it.#like i had to take certain classes first & i couldnt take them during the semesters that in-major students would take them#and i had to have my gpa up to a certain level etc etc. so many hoops to jump thru. i think it took me at least a year. or more. idr#but i made it in and thats my major. thats my thing. computers and information systems and communication.#doesnt FEEL like im an almost-graduate. but then i think about all the things ive taken and learned.#and maybe i dont remember a lot of the more specific things from these classes. but i took core lessons away from each one.#wont be able to recite the theories but i can live them. and thats the point of an education i guess.#anyways im gonna have to start job searching before too long and eughhbb. need to get my license first tho probably.#which i will... i will.... i have so many things to deal with... my life will be So Different in a year...#it will require me to put in the work now. but i can do it. and then a year from now. i'll hopefully be in a better spot.#living somewhere else. graduated from college. with a license and a car. maybe even an IT job of some kind.#kind of scared of trying to find a Big Boy Job. aka a job that requires a degree and networking and all that shit.#rather than just showing up and being like Hi i can do this job. i am not a total drain of a person. hire me please 👍#hfkahfks so many things to think about. and through it all i am still dealing with DEADLINES...!!!!#but yeah this is why my writing has largely been put on hold. idk i have a lot of things im dealing with rn.
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dinopepitah · 1 year ago
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I cant concentrate in my studies- heres a spamton bleping
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lemongogo · 1 year ago
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i need 2 stop drawing static stuff . white bg . front facing pose. <will do it again
#i looked thru my media tab 2day .horrific#WHERES THA PURPOSEEEE E#there doesnt have 2 be any . of coursies .#but thats smt i want to work on rly hard T_T 2024!!!!!!!!!#smth smth reflection but i am happy with what ive done in 2023#definitely havent finished as many things as id hoped but thats okay.kind of touched on it w that one trgn comp a few months ago#but i tried 2 be more confident in areas i wasnt so sure abt before and it paid off in a way that im happy with T__T❤️#like despite all my gloom & burnout and artblock . i had a lot of fun . and im rly fortunate that ive been able to meet the nicest ppl#through it T__T#idk what jm talking abt anymore but j think . i am happy w the direction im headed in and i just need to work harder now on variability#and concept and composition. not rly sure where to start but i think compiling some of my favs in a single place#and studying them will help. :3.. AND NOT GIVING UP A SKETCH IF ITS FRUSTRATING ATM😭😭😭😭#some of them ..that one w meryl and vash . i ould not for the life of me figure out and i was like soo done w it#but then i was likeno OK just do it who cares . and then i found a workflow that worked and it WAS SOO MUCH FUNNN AND I STILL RLY LOVE HOW#IT TURNED OUTTT ..#and the one w knives . the beautiful universe one . i rmbr being so annoyed by a similar attempt that inwas lkke fuck it im just gna use the#biggest brush ever and play arnd with stuff bc its not gna see the light of day and fhen j agonized abt sharing it and everyone WAS SOOO#NICE TO ME !!&2&2 LIKEEE it was one of my earliest trgn pieces so kind of new 2 da scene and lkke . idk man it helped me enjoy my art from#an outside perspective after struggling w the doubt and its now one of my favorites ever too …#ORRR .. the vash and wolfwood one w the silly blue sky bg .. the textures were so mindless and fun#or the elendira . SOOO MANY FUN ELENDIRAS.. the perspective nail gun one is still a fav bc i shy away from perspective bc its hard as shit#but it worked out and i luv it tew .#sory anyways . very happy. and thankful^__^ ik when j post stuff like URRG MY ART!!!it mostly jst comes from .like GAAH want 2 push myself#harder bc i know itll be fun once i get 2 where im going T_T#anyways if u got 2 this point u r lkterally angel my angelll~ hamtaro pic#tys
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